As you may have noticed, The Gentle Sophalina left us yesterday. Yesterday was the crying sobbing day. Today is the day when there is relief that she is no longer in discomfort. There are also occasional whimpers today when I am knitting without feline interruption. I stayed with her as it happened and in that brief surreal moment when you don't realize exactly what's going on, I thought, "Oh look- she's doesn't have that labored breathing anymore, she's all better." And really, she is.
What I wonder today- and I'm thinking only on that purely philosophical, metaphysical, not so religious level- is where did she go?
Her body was still there- in fact to my surprise, it was exactly the same. With no funeral director or television producer there to creep me out, it was just a peaceful kitty.
The "she" that was her wasn't her body. It was the way she bonked my feet to say hello when I was on the recliner and then poked her funny head through my knitting. It was the perky little skip in her step when she knew I was headed to the door to let her outside. It was they way she learned to beg on her hind legs for lunchmeat every morning.
I learned in 6th grade that you can't throw anything away on the planet. It was a lesson in recycling and it stuck. Just because you can't see it, doesn't mean it's gone. I'm just not sure where it is.
Husband Bob said that Brother Fred, who died on the same day 3 years ago, must have wanted a cat.
13 comments:
Oh, I'm so sorry. It's so hard to lose a pet you love. She'll always be Real.
If it means anything to you, my youngest son, when he wasn't even two years old, told me this: "I used to be an old man. Then I died. Then I was a baby again." He made similar comments, especially about events that happened in the 1940's, until he was about four, and then he stopped. Maybe Sophie's just having a rest.
Husband Bob is a good husband.
Just found your blog and I'm very sorry about your cat. It can't have been an easy decision.
my condolences; When I saw sophie's sweet picture yesterday I knew.
I am sorry for your loss. It is amazing how much the animals that choose to love us also give in return. I know that your decision was not easy. But is also showed how much you loved her in return.
Its hard to say goodbye to our buddies. I noticed the picture yesterday and I wondered if something had happened, so sorry. :o(
Re your comment on the "ta-tas". Since I know you could use a smile, I thought I'd share: Recently, I was driving down the freeway and this beat-up pickup truck, all jacked-up and driven by exactly the guy you'd think would be driving it, roared past me. On the bumper was a sticker with two breasts, wrapped in a pink ribbon. It said, "Save the Ta-Tas!" I laughed so hard I almost had to pull over.
Oh Becky, I'm so sorry! I'm massively attached to my little guys, so I can imagine your heartbreak. Take care and I hope you will still have a nice time in PacWest.
Re: your comment on my blog: The actual afghan calls for 20 squares but, like an idiot, I decided to made a king size bedspread so I will need 36 or so. The challenge is that I want no two alike so I am hunting up different books and patterns. The eye cord design was quite not diificult but rather tedious as the design progressed. Quite simply, I began to wonder if I would ever get done. I'm not sure I would want to start a project that called for a large number of those "Squiggles" as my husband so kindly referred to them.
I am so, so sorry for your loss of your sweet kitty. I pray that you reach that place soon where you remember mostly the fun times and cute habits she had, and can smile that you were lucky enough to have her in your life.
My nana always tells me about crossing the rainbow bridge when I have lost one of my dear kitties, and it brings comfort sometimes to think about them all there together, romping like kittens and waiting for us to come for them some day... Your husband is great,and I'll bet that Fred did want a cat!
So sorry that she's gone, but glad that her suffering is over. Peace.
sorry to hear about your loss, but am glad that you were blessed with such a sweet kitty. i have two dogs (my girls) who are currently 9 and 7 years-old. they are like my children. i can't imagine the day that something happens to them. i'm sure your kitty is in a happy place. you are in my thoughts.
Thank you so VERY much for sharing that with me. It does help. As I told someone yesterday, I don't know where pets' souls go when they die, but that's where I want to go too...
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