Monday, February 28, 2011


So lunch wasn't horrible but that's not the funny part. It was a little runny but I may strain out some of the liquid before tomorrow. Enough garlic makes everything good.

Crack me up part:

I have a former student teacher who is living in Latvia. She received a phrase book upon arriving to help acquaint her with the language. I won't bother with the Latvian translations-(I wouldn't be able to find all of the accent marks necessary) but what follows is what is offered as the standard luggage dialogue

***Edited to add*** My friend reassures me that Latvians speak excellent English and this phrase book is an anomoly- crazy funny nonetheless!

What has happened with my luggage?

We don't know anything about your luggage

The luggage belt is empty.

Probably somebody has taken your luggage. Maybe you haven't had luggage.

Here you are the luggage coupon!

What was in your luggage?

THere were important documents there.

You should have used hand luggage for that purpose.

Can you offer me a set of prime necessity goods?

In this case we don't see the necessity.

If you enjoyed these, I have more where that came from- also if you leave a comment, feel free to do so in a Latvian dialogue style.

Sunday, February 27, 2011

Lunchtime Experimentation.

As reported earlier on this blog, I've given up the in-house deli service that Mr. Sophanne is more than happy to offer. It's been three weeks and I haven't starved.

Week one was the refried bean/taco salad.

Weeks two and three were black beans and rice- mmm how I love them.

This week is an experiment- It's a salad/spread of sorts inspired by some internet readings. It's comprised of black beans, garbanzo beans, white kidney beans, pine nuts, chopped tomato, succotash (the frozen corn and lima bean kind) and garlic virtually swimming in sour cream. I did not intend for it to be swimming but I foolishly dumped the whole container in before mixing.

I'll be wrapping this up in a burrito shell for lunch.

I have the camera and a picture would be possible but that may prejudice the opinions I seek out. Some things taste better than they look. I hope.

I purchased some microwave popcorn as a back up. There's a candy machine nearby-

What are the predictions?

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Extree Extree Read all about it...

I, my friends, am Magic Looping.

And I have Rebecca Danger's Knitted Monster Book to thank for it.

Her patterns made it worthwhile to me to figure it out. Her directions were as clear as the forty thousand hundred other sets of magic loop directions that I've both purchased and read. The cuteness of her monsters made me want to stick it out. Oh yes, you can do these on dpns but even I, lover of all sticks that are double pointed, saw the tediousness which would ensue- and I wanted to MAKE MONSTERS FASTER!

This was all completed while under the influence of nearly psychotic hormones and I think perhaps both the circular needle and the yarn might have been a little fearful- even with medication.

I believe the key was to have Mr. Sophanne out of the house. While working on our taxes he realized he needed a win/loss statement from the casino. The process of getting this would be expedited by making a trip there. What's a guy to do- especially when he's got some winnings from last time in his pocket?

Friday, February 18, 2011

What we've resorted to...

Lunchtime is still a blathering of (insert slight WV twange here) "well I said to Aunt Mavis, I said..." and "Uncle Junior is related to the Bookers on the Mom's side andher sister is married to my mother's brother-in-law..."

Oh the humanity....

The secretary and I have resorted to making a laughing game whenever a piece of lunchtime popcorn misses our mouth and falls to the floor. We are so easily amused.

Speaking of the secretary, I covered for her in the office yesterday afternoon. Let it be said that I know ABSOLUTELY NOTHING about shorthand. She knows it, does it, and rocks it. One time I jokingly came in and said "Take a memo." and she pulled out the notepad and wrote every word I said.

Yesterday, feeling the Power of the Secretary Chair, I pulled out the steno pad and wrote some squiggles of my own and asked her to translate them. Turns out I am skilled with the ability to write meaningful shorthand words without understanding what I say. I can WRITE shorthand- I just don't know what I'm writing.

could you come over to play. Company information. Come prepared you have to work in.

Mr. Sophanne says I was a stenographer in a former life. I say maybe it's like a Ouija board into my subconscious.

Monday, February 14, 2011

Roses are Red Violets are blue

Finish this poem...
It's something to do.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

A Converstaion

Last week, Mr. Sophanne (ms) and I (me) had the following conversation:

ms: Let's not buy anything for Valentine's Day. Let's just do cards.

me: o.k.

I really am good with that. I struggle with the whole thing.

me: If we do cards, we'll both have to sneak off and get cards and then we'll just throw them away. Let's go to the store, pick out cards for each other, give them to each other in the store and then go home.

ms: or we could just write our own cards.

me: o.k.

ms: I've already started mine.

End of Conversation.

Pulled in hook, line and sinker I was though he says that was not his intention. After a few days of panic, I realized that I had the emails we exchanged when we first started dating. Some of the things he wrote are what convinced me that he was an interesting person to get to know (and eventually marry.)

After culling through some of the dialogue, I remembered that there was this whole give and take metaphor regarding cows- lots of puns and pretty funny. My "card" is now ready- I decided that it would look better in a frame. (and he won't be able to throw it away.)

I'm pretty sure it will embiggen if you want to read the words- I can't promise they'll make sense to anyone but me.

Tuesday, February 08, 2011

right where HE put it!

So the camera was found this evening in plain sight- right where Mr. Sophanne put it when he took it on his adventure with brudder number 1. He just didn't tell me he took it and I only this evening expanded my looking places as my hideyholes had been given a thorough going over.

First the best dog ever waiting for da brudders three

Then a handy way to keep brudder number one entertained for an hour

Then an "action" shot of brudder number 1 in his NS toboggan.

What a nice surprise to find both the camera and some bonus pictures on it!

And for the record- The Superbowl ads had little or no effect on my buying habits. I don't need a new car, bud light, or doritos (and after a couple of those dorito commerials I may never eat them again). But, for the few days I thought I was cameraless, all it took for me to think about buying one was jellidonut saying in the comments "the quickest way to find it is to buy a new one." So much for my minimalist outlook. And Jelli- you could be making millions in advertising.

Monday, February 07, 2011

Twenny dollah

As in $20 to the person who can tell me where I left my stinkin' camera. The last time I had it I was taking a picture of Lil Liza Jane as she was waiting for the brudders three to arrive. (2 weekends ago). There's a great shot of her looking longingly out the window just before the action began. After that it's all a blur.

In unexpected knitting news, I've finished chart 1 (and all associated repeats) of Icarus. Imagine my surprise last Friday when I didn't read the pattern, started chart two too soon and had to tink 341 lace stitches. (you crack me up if you noticed the two too and had a little laugh in your head)

A few posts ago there was a picture of Lil Liza from this summer in the sunny grass. I will confess here that when Cindy asked about whether the green stuff under her feet (in the picture) was hurting her, I did indeed start an email to her that said "no that's the grass, she likes it" before I realized her funniness. I was feeling pretty dense about it all until this evening when Aunt of Sophanne (before she gave it any thought) said "why don't you have any snow at your house?" It must just run in the family.

Tonights feature film is Kansas City Confidential

Sunday, February 06, 2011

Lean Times

it is for the blog, lean times.

Add to that a misplaced camera and I might just as well write "insert blog post here."

Item One- New Find

I've recently crawled out from the rock under which I'd apparently been living and discovered Netflix. It's perfect for the iPad and officially makes me glad that I purchased it.

Now between 9-9:30 pm as Mr. Sophanne is watching "Sons of Anarchy" or "Gangland" or that zombie t.v. show, I can pull out the iPad click, wait a few seconds and have 1940's film noir at my fingertips. I watch about twenty minutes of it and return to it like an old friend the next night. Edgar G. Robinson in his less gangster-like roles has been the featured actor of choice. There is something about the style of those movies that captivates me.

Item Two-Lunches

For the last year, Mr. Sophanne has been making an extra sandwich for me in the morning so I haven't been packing my lunch. These aren't your generic PB&J's. These humble Dagwood Bumstead. Meat (a roast, meatloaf, baked chicken- all done the Sunday night before), lettuce, tomato, cheese, sometimes avacado, condiments all on a toasted bagel smashed to perfection in a plastic sandwich container. (the lunchtime conversation about whether those were special bagels, or if we had a sandwich smasher will be saved for another day- I'm not sure I can share it without sounding all smarty-pants.)

He also takes the "meat of the week" and often prepares a rice-a-roni- broccoli dish for dinner. While I am not one to look a gift sandwich in the mouth, I've noticed that I have become mean and sort of logey. I'm starting to wonder if my body isn't saying "TOO MUCH MEAT!"

This week for lunch I'm on my own and I've made plastic container sizes of layered refried bean taco salad. (and I ask you is there anything better on the planet than sour cream and cream cheese mixed together in spreadable goodness? I think not) Lunchtime continues to be a "one-upping gossip fest" and I'm hoping that this concoction will at least give me one reason to get up in the morning. The verdict is out as to whether it will taste as good on day 5 as it did on day one. I've got black beans and rice and hummus in the plans for the next couple of weeks. It might be my new thing to figure out on Sundays.

Item Three- Mean and Logey

Last week while eating dinner, it was all I could do not to throw my food to the floor and scream at Mr. Sophanne "YOU SOUND LIKE A PIG WHEN YOU EAT!!" He does a little bit but this isn't something new and generally I've grown accustomed to it. Later that night as he was negotiating the Wii game "Spore" I had to physically restrain myself from grabbing the remote and screaming "YOU"VE BEEN TRYING TO JUMP ONTO THAT @#$ #$)W%(*@ MUSHROOM FOR TWENTY MINUTES NOT COUNTING THE TIME YOU SPENT TRYING TO DO IT LAST WEEK!!! HE CAN'T JUMP UP THERE!!!!"

These are more powerful than the normal hormones at work. These required medication and even then were only slightly muted. I know not from whence they come. I've been able to keep them subdued at school but mostly because kids know the warning signs and have been treading lightly.

I woke up yesterday morning and these violent tendencies seemed to have passed for the moment. I sent him off to the casino for a day of quiet just in case. I also suggested that he go because he had a sniffly nose and was whining about not knowing whether to go or not. There's just only so much a girl can take. Some people catch colds. Me, I catch irrational psychotic tendencies that come and go like colds.

Wednesday, February 02, 2011

In my imagination

I am here.

In reality, the thrill of this wintry day was the arrival of a "callus reducer" for my feet and the fact that my heels no longer resemble flaking rhinoceros skin. I thought the above made a better picture since it's going to take a few more rounds to get those feet in shape. As an added bonus, today is the first day in many that we are not under a hazardous weather advisory, so that's kind of nice too.

Really, I have nothing, but Aunt of Sophanne pointed out that it had been some time since my last post and I felt an urge to remedy that.