Observations

Weather phenomena- today when I walked out of the building the sun was shining. And the snow was coming down like in a snow globe with almost zero visibility.  Is there such a thing as a "snowbow?"

Food phenomena- roasted cabbage with lots of black pepper almost tastes like egg noodles.  I love it.

Men and women-today greathusbandbob was serving as minority election inspector which means he’s one of the guys that does important things like read ballot numbers when people are voting.  When I walked in and gave them my name, all of them groaned, laughed and then said “you poor poor woman.” Which I totally get. BUT I can tell you that if the tables were turned and I was for whatever reason in a similar situation, he would have a cow and then that cow would have a cow.  Men are dumb.  You heard it here first.

High school kids.  When they are acting jerky it’s much harder not to take it personally. It’s easy peasy with the little ones. Ugh. I will have higher expectations next year and won’t smile until November.  I know they think I’m a pushover because I feed them. And laugh when they are funny.

The dog.  She is not a dog that likes to be petted.  She’s always been that way. She'll snuggle against you but she only just tolerates petting. I took some time last week to read her body language when I was trying to pet her.  It was so obvious once I started looking. Then I think but how will she know I adore her.  And then I watched her some more and realized her favorite thing to do in the world is play chase right when I get home.  She brings her toy with an impish  grin and then runs.  The game involves going from one end of the hallway to the other and occasionally throwing the toy (when I can get it)  I am adapting.

Fear and the introvert.  A new kindergarten aide invited me to join her for a trip to the Phipps Conservatory and Botanical Gardens on Easter.  She already knows I’m not very Jesus-y.  She isn’t either and her husband has to work that day so I said o.k.  Except come to find ever since greathusbandbob was sick I haven’t wanted to wander too far from home- more specifically- him.  I’ve wanted to go there forever, we usually avoid major holidays with an afternoon at the casino (which GHB will likely do with or without me.) and it’s a new and quirky friend and another chance for me to say in my head "she likes me, she really likes me."  There is just a part of me that is struggling to go back to normal.  Now that I see it for what it is (unlike when I didn’t go to New York last month) I think I am better equipped to manage but there was a feeling I wasn’t expecting.

The vice-president.  When I hear him talking about Christianity (some interview this week) I can’t help but imagine that he’s talking about elves and gnomes and hobbits and fairies and leprechauns.  It’s not when any old person talks about it (well maybe a little) but mostly it’s really bad when it’s him.  Mike Pence makes me an atheist (botanical gardens here I come)

And finally as I proofread this post, I realize it’s relatively concise and to the point in the observations.  Except it took more than an hour to write it because I kept forgetting ideas and words.  In fact I wrote this below just to remember this part:

Forgetting words

I’m certain it’s hormonal. I just can’t believe how inarticulate and cloudy minded I’ve felt.  I don’t do the "senior moment" excuse (there’s always someone older than me around anyway). I don’t get mad and try to fight it.  I’m certain that makes it worse,  I try to just watch my brain go by and tell myself that whatever it was will come back in a little bit.  Also this afternoon in my head I heard myself sneering "I will cut you" to adults that were driving me crazy. I will not really do that and I don’t really want to but the ferocity with which these feelings arise is also startling.