Wednesday, August 15, 2012

Show me the funny- knit night edition

KnitnightTara has been featured here several times.  Really, for as much as I've been posting, or been funny, this could really be her blog by proxy.

Last night at knit night was no exception.  She was accounting to us her recent slightly OCD cleaning spree.  I asked her if she dusted her vacuum cleaner (I once knew someone who did that)  She said,

 "no, I take my vacuum cleaner apart and vacuum it with another vacuum cleaner. I LOVE cleaning my vacuum cleaner."

She also said that she sometimes gets freezer burn from using compressed air to dust with.

The rest of the conversation (with different people participating) went something like this:

Some people really get addicted to that propellant.

Yea, they're probably not addicted to air.

I'M addicted to air.

Quick!  We need an intervention!   Hilarious.

Later that evening Tara told the story of a couple who were distressed about the fact that people were abandoning kittens at their home. (It had happened twice)  The husband said, "I'm going to put up a sign that says I'm going to call the police if it happens again."

Someone else at knit night wondered aloud, "what could they be arrested for?"

KnitnightMarc replied, "LITTERING!"  It was HILARIOUS!

Moving on...

Today at school I learned about the reward system at one of my more difficult schools.  I was told there are 6 kids in the class and if they receive 8 reward tokens (EACH) by the end of class, they will get a reward when I leave.  In addition to teaching a little something I will somehow (hopefully) be giving 48 reward tokens in a period of 40 minutes.  I was informed however that if a student was being restrained for physical aggression by one of the other instructors, I was NOT to give a token- even if s/he was participating.

Ten years ago this would have left me slightly nervous and on edge for the first day at this school.  While getting old and fat has done nothing for my personal self-image, I can tell you that having 25 years of teaching experience behind me makes me feel GREAT!  In fact rather than being nervous about it, I think it's all, once again, HILARIOUS! (which also happens to be my new favorite word.)

And finally a knitting report.

I finished the boring repetitive part of Juno Regina with my gorgeous Yarnageddon alpaca silk laceweight yarn.  I began the ending diamonds.

I knit chart 7 (reading the chart rather than the typed out version- I'm getting that good)

I knit chart 8. as above.  Yeah, buddy!

I knit chart 9 go the heck out of me.  Awesome knitter is my middle name.

I knit chart 11- I am so good at seeing and remembering the symbols for all of those knit 4 and knit 3 togethers.  Look at all of those yarn overs!  This will be the best lace EVAH!

The observant and knitting-Goddess afflicted among you (I'm looking at YOU Yarnhog) will immediately recognize the problem.  Not only did I skip chart 10, I went to chart 11 which included a hairy ass pile of knit togethers and yarnovers in LACEWEIGHT.  Who can see that shit to fix it?

It's been tinked (both the first row of chart 11 and the purl row that followed it).  Where once there were 89 stitches there are now 84. Juno Regina's got some splainin' to do and I've got some bifocals to get so I can get things back in order.

The Knitting Goddess, however, thinks this is HILARIOUS!

ETA- In still MORE TARAWESOMENESS, she just emailed me video of the School Bus Demolition Derby taking place at the Washington County Fair Grounds!  Hi-damn-larry-bus!
p.s. throwslikeagirl, I AM STILL THINKING OF YOU!


Roxie said...

Your knit-night sounds ribald! Those knitters are a stitch!

She cleans her vacuum? With another vacuum? I bet she knits tight and will re-do a row if the tension is uneven. At least she realizes that this is something to laugh at.

Bummer about skipping a pattern, but I totally see how that could happen. in lace weight? My heart bleeds for you!

kmkat said...

I want to come to your knit night. Me and my somewhat odd sense of humor would fit right in. Oh, and when "hilarious" gets boring, try this: fabulous!

throwslikeagirl74 said...